Category Archives: celebrities

It is NOT OK

Today I am utterly, thoroughly, disgusted.  I have listened this past month, with a heavy heart, to the story of the girls in Gloucester, Massachusetts and their naïve pact to join one another in childhood pregnancy.  Setting aside for a minute the myriad issues that surround such a pact, let’s focus on this:  these are girls having children.  They’re not young women, they’re not even legal to vote.  I have wondered about these girls and their dreams; I have despaired that their desire for love is so great that they’re grabbing it the only way they know how:  by creating a life that will love them.

But will it feel like love after those first few days?  Will they feel loved and fulfilled and happy when they’re tiny little baby crops a fever of 104 in the middle of the night and they are all alone to deal with it?  Will they feel the love when their little sweetie has colic and screams for hours on end, with no apparent consolation in sight?  Will they feel love when they are exhausted and at their wits end, and the baby is hungry yet again.  What about money?  Diapers, formula (surely they won’t all breastfeed), clothing, and baby gear don’t come cheap?  How will they provide for the child?

Moreover, how will they provide for themselves?  How will they feel about themselves?  Today?  Tomorrow?  In ten years?  And in a few years after that, how will their little boys and girls, now adolescents, feel about them?  My heart wrenches when I think of their futures, and the futures they are offering to these tiny, unsuspecting babies.

So this pact has been on my mind, and my heart has gone out to these girls and the mistakes they have made.  And then I turn around and see none other than Jamie Lynn Spears, apparently the new posterchild for teen motherhood, declaring to OK Magazine that motherhood is “so much fun.”  I just want to hug her and kiss her,” she proclaims of her new daughter, “and I’m happy all the time.” 

Well, good for you Jamie Lynn.  And shame on OK Magazine for glamorizing one of the most difficult possible situations in which a young girl can find herself.  There is no better way to word it:  I am simply disgusted.  Of course, teen motherhood must be absolutely lovely, with all of the help the income from Zoey 101 (Jamie’s TV show) can provide.  It must be just great, when, compared with your older sister, your teen pregnancy is the least of the family’s worries.  But for all of the other girls out there, who don’t have these resources, and are desperately craving love and comfort, you’ve just sent the absolute wrong message.  It’s not all fun and games, girls, and certainly not if you’re sixteen, on your own, uneducated, and broke.  And here’s the thing:  It’s just not all about you.  

Do You Know What’s On Your Child’s IPod?

PARENTAL ADVISORY: EXPLICIT LYRICS FOUND HERE

Dear Friends,

I’ve known some of you for many years, others for just a short time. Regardless, I know that you love your children as dearly as I love mine. I’ve realized, during the past eleven+ years of parenting, that each of us brings our own experiences, values, and desires to the parenting table. One way doesn’t work for all of us, and it shouldn’t.

That said, many of you also know the trouble I have with lyrics to some of the songs that are topping the charts right now. During a recent conversation with a friend, I realized that some of you probably think I’m nuts. Oh, her. She’s the crazy one. Lyrics Nazi.

But I am not crazy, I promise. I’m not even that easily offended. I am simply informed and disturbed by the constant repetition of these lyrics straight from their iPods into our childrens’ heads. Over and over again.

So if you are easily offended—or ignorant of these lyrics and wish to remain so—please stop reading now. You can click here to read a happier post.

For those of hardier stock, forge on.

Song 1: Low by Flo Rida (Guest rapper T-Pain)

This song is all over the radio and very catchy. I found myself singing along to the chorus one day, after driving for 7 hours and hearing it 700 times. When I returned home, I asked my 11-year old if he was familiar with it. Yes, of course, because he’s the only one who doesn’t have it on his iPod. My fault, again. I am not winning big points here. Thank goodness parenting isn’t about winning points or I’d be in serious trouble.

Partial Lyrics (for full lyrics, click here)

Hey
Shawty what I gotta do to get you home


My jeans full of gwap
…

…One stack (come on)


Two stacks (come on)


Three stacks (come on, now that’s three grand)


What you think I’m playin baby girl


I’m the man, I’ll bend the rubber bands

That’s what I told her, her legs on my shoulder


I knew it was ova, that Henny and Cola


Got me like a Soldier


She ready for Rover, I couldn’t control her


So lucky oo me, I was just like a clover


Shorty was hot like a toaster


Sorry but I had to fold her,
Like a pornography poster


Yea she was worth the money


Lil mama took my cash,


and I ain’t want it back,


The way she bit that rag,


got her them paper stacks,


Tattoo Above her crack,


I had to handle that…

I’ll leave the translation to you. If you don’t have any idea what it’s about, you can e-mail me. Here’s a hint: He’s paying her for sex. If you care to peek at the video, here it is. I find less offensive than the lyrics, which isn’t saying much.

/p>


Song 2: Lollipop by Lil Wayne

Currently #1 on the charts. This is a catchy tune that kids love.

Partial Lyrics ( for full lyrics, click here)

I say he so sweet make her wanna lick the wrapper

So I let her lick da rapper.

She say I’m l-l-l-l-l-l-like a lollipop (yeah)

She say I’m l-l-l-l-l-l-like a lollipop (yeah) …

…Shawty wanna hump

You know I like to touch

Ya lovely lady lumps

(She lick me like a lollipop)

…Shawty wanna hump

You know I like to touch

Ya lovely lady lumps

Ok lil mama had a swagga like mine

She even wear her hair down her back like mine

I make her feel right when its wrong like lyin

Man she ain’t never had a luv like mine

But man I ain’t never seen a ass like hers

Dat pussy in my mouth had me lost for words

So I told her back it up like burp burp

And I made dat ass jump like jurp jurp

And dats when she

Say I’m l-l-l-l-l-l-like a lollipop (yeah)

If you didn’t catch it the first time around, this one’s about a guy getting a blow job.

See the video here:

Yes, there are “clean” versions of these types of songs. But the “clean” versions simply delete the expletives. Does it really matter if a song says “ass,” when he’s talking about her “pussy in [his] mouth”?

Contrary to what our kids would like us to believe, the lyrics matter, my friends. It’s not just about the beat. What our kids listen to day after day, on bus rides, soccer trips, and hanging out with their buddies, matters. Because each of our families function differently, I’m not telling you to ban this music. But I am asking you to pay attention. Know what your kids like to listen to & talk to them about what they’re hearing. Think about, please, whether you want this drivel filling your kids’ heads, regardless of what everyone else is listening to.

And let’s not even get into the grammar…