Kids and TV—and the negative relationship—is in the news again, and I’m not surprised.Evidence has long shown that a TV show here and there is no big deal, but turn the bugger on regularly and you’re asking for trouble.
What surprises me is that, as a society, we have not just ignored this mountain of evidence, but that we regularly walk our children to the top of the mountain and plunk them down in front of Sponge Bob for yet another hour.I know, I know, you love Sponge Bob, right?I know lots of parents who do.So watch it.Let your kids watch it from time to time.But every day?They’ve got better things to do, trust me.
The latest research shows that when the TV is on and kids are playing nearby, not engaged with it, not watching it, mind you, that the background noise influences the length and depth of their play.Parenting is hard work and we all know it. I’m not suggesting that kids should never chill out with a fun show while we grab a breath in the next room. Every parent needs a break from time to time.But the research is out there:TV isn’t the devil, but it’s not the answer to our prayers, either.
To read more about what I think, click here for info on my book, I Want to Teach My Child About Media.
I’ve known some of you for many years, others for just a short time.Regardless, I know that you love your children as dearly as I love mine.I’ve realized, during the past eleven+ years of parenting, that each of us brings our own experiences, values, and desires to the parenting table.One way doesn’t work for all of us, and it shouldn’t.
That said, many of you also know the trouble I have with lyrics to some of the songs that are topping the charts right now.During a recent conversation with a friend, I realized that some of you probably think I’m nuts.Oh, her.She’s the crazy one.Lyrics Nazi.
But I am not crazy, I promise.I’m not even that easily offended.I am simply informed and disturbed by the constant repetition of these lyrics straight from their iPods into our childrens’ heads.Over and over again.
So if you are easily offended—or ignorant of these lyrics and wish to remain so—please stop reading now.You can click here to read a happier post.
For those of hardier stock, forge on.
Song 1:Low by Flo Rida (Guest rapper T-Pain)
This song is all over the radio and very catchy.I found myself singing along to the chorus one day, after driving for 7 hours and hearing it 700 times.When I returned home, I asked my 11-year old if he was familiar with it.Yes, of course, because he’s the only one who doesn’t have it on his iPod.My fault, again.I am not winning big points here.Thank goodness parenting isn’t about winning points or I’d be in serious trouble.
Sorry but I had to fold her, Like a pornography poster
…
Yea she was worth the money
Lil mama took my cash,
and I ain’t want it back,
The way she bit that rag,
got her them paper stacks,
Tattoo Above her crack,
I had to handle that…
I’ll leave the translation to you.If you don’t have any idea what it’s about, you can e-mail me.Here’s a hint:He’s paying her for sex. If you care to peek at the video, here it is.I find less offensive than the lyrics, which isn’t saying much.
/p>
Song 2:Lollipop by Lil Wayne
Currently #1 on the charts.This is a catchy tune that kids love.
If you didn’t catch it the first time around, this one’s about a guy getting a blow job.
See the video here:
Yes, there are “clean” versions of these types of songs.But the “clean” versions simply delete the expletives.Does it really matter if a song says “ass,” when he’s talking about her “pussy in [his] mouth”?
Contrary to what our kids would like us to believe, the lyrics matter, my friends. It’s not just about the beat. What our kids listen to day after day, on bus rides, soccer trips, and hanging out with their buddies, matters.Because each of our families function differently, I’m not telling you to ban this music. But I am asking you to pay attention. Know what your kids like to listen to & talk to them about what they’re hearing. Think about, please, whether you want this drivel filling your kids’ heads, regardless of what everyone else is listening to.
I absolutely love life with a 5-year old. Here’s a snippet:
E: Do you want to play the animal game? Me: Okay, sure. E: I have an animal. You guess. Me: Okay, does it live in the forest? E: Nope. Me: Does it live in the ocean? E: No. But it lives a lot of different places. Me: Can it fly? E: No, it can’t fly. Me: Does it have four legs. E: Yes. Four legs, I think, or maybe two. Me: Does it have wings? E: Uhhh, then it could fly. It can’t fly. Me: Oh, right. Is it smaller than Tucker (our lab)? E: Oh, yes, waaaay smaller. Me: Is it brown? E: No, it’s gray. Me: Can it hop? E: Yes, it can hop. Also, it’s really, really fast. Me: Is it a grasshopper? E: No, smaller. Me: Is it a cricket? E: No, smaller. Me: Ummm, I don’t know. Can I have a hint? E: It likes cheese. Me: It can hop, it’s smaller than a cricket, and it likes cheese? Is it a mouse? E: Yep! You got it!
This is so different from conversations with my eleven and eight-year olds. Over dinner recently, my eleven-year old was complaining about my censorship of the music he downloads on his iPod. We were discussing one popular song in particular:
M: But, mom, everyone has that song except for me. Me: I understand that the song has a fun beat. Even I like the beat. But do you know what that song is about? M: What? Me: It’s about paying a prostitute. M: What’s that? Me: It’s a woman that you pay to have sex with you. C – the 8-year old, who I have forgotten is sitting beside me: Oh, yeah, what IS that, mom? Me: (Uh-oh; even M realizes my mistake; all eyes are now on me) Ummm, oohhhh, um, Chase, that is something that dad will, ummm, talk to you about later. But right now, boys, we’re talking about music. Can we just talk about the lyrics right now?
